Diminishing Returns
9 11 2009More is not always better. Unfortunately, some companies have ignored this principle altogether and adopted the less-popular creed “it doesn’t matter how irrational the end result will be, more is our best option.” Here are a few examples that come to mind…
Razor Blades
The Mach 3 is almost laughable now. Three blades? What, is Clinton still in office? The new standard is a minimum of five blades, multiple lubricating strips, and a colorful, aerodynamic handle (incase you’re shaving at high speeds). Where is this going? By the time I teach my boys how to shave, I’ll be showing them how to put on their razor mask (416 blades) and shake their head up and down for the closest shave yet (which will still be the tag line).
Chicken Soup for the Soul
I’m in the process of developing a theory that if you don’t fit into a Chicken Soup for the Soul category, you are the most worthless person on the planet. Sure, that may sound harsh, but I don’t even think I’m offending anyone. We may have reached the point where it is physically impossible to avoid being categorized by CS for the S. Isn’t that a sign of end times?
NOW
My friend (and financial adviser) Justin told me he just saw a commercial for NOW That’s What I Call Music 32. Thirty-freaking-two! Where will the line be drawn? I bet the only person who owns every NOW album has also seen every episode of Survivor.
Ply
Hey Charmin, we were fine with two-ply. I’m not sure who told you we needed more, but that person cannot be trusted. Instead of progressively adding more and more ply (to the point that we’ll be wiping with a beach towel), why don’t you concentrate your efforts on something more practical, like, I don’t know, massaging toilet paper or toilet paper with apps.
What else?
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